ContentAwareness

We Were Told This Was Normal… Turns Out It Was Emotional Repression

Jul 13, 2025

Written by: [Michael C]
© [2025] All rights reserved.

We Were Told This Was Normal… Turns Out It Was Emotional Repression

🤐 I. “Stop Crying or I’ll Give You Something to Cry About.”

If you just flinched a little,
you already know where this is going.

There were things we all heard growing up —
words that were supposed to teach us “strength” or “discipline.”
But now, looking back, something feels… wrong.

We didn’t get stronger.
We got quieter.

Because when you’re told to stop crying enough times,
you learn to bury the pain instead of feeling it.

Not because you weren’t hurting —
but because no one made room for your hurt.

💬 II. “You’re Too Sensitive.”

A phrase that haunted so many of us.

It didn’t mean you were weak.
It meant your feelings made others uncomfortable.

And instead of learning how to process them,
you learned how to minimize yourself.

To go silent.
To laugh it off.
To smile when you wanted to scream.
To say “it’s fine” when you felt broken.

We called it growing up.
Turns out, it was just repression wrapped in politeness.

🛑 III. The Things We Didn’t Know Were Emotional Repression

We were told things like:

  • “Don’t air your dirty laundry.”
  • “Get over it.”
  • “Be grateful. Others have it worse.”
  • “What happens in this house stays in this house.”

But these weren’t just cultural quirks or tough love.

They were systems of emotional shutdown.
And they left marks.

Because if you weren’t allowed to feel…
you weren’t allowed to heal.

🧠 IV. How It Shows Up Now (Even If You Don’t Realize It)

Fast forward to today.
You flinch when someone raises their voice.
You shut down during conflict.
You feel guilty for setting boundaries.
You avoid being “too much.”

That’s not personality.
That’s protective wiring.

You were taught to suppress,
so now even basic expression feels unsafe.

🔄 V. “We Didn’t Know Any Better” — But Now We Do

Our parents didn’t get the tools either.
They passed down what they were taught.

And now, we’re the ones caught in between:

  • Still learning how to feel
  • Still learning that emotions aren’t weaknesses
  • Still learning how to explain our silence to partners and friends who expect vulnerability we were never allowed to practice

It’s not about blame.
It’s about awareness.

Because when you name something,
you give it less power over you.

🌱 Final Thought: It Was Never “Too Much” — It Was Just Real

The next time you feel like you’re overreacting…
pause.

Ask yourself:

Are you reacting to this moment…
or to a lifetime of being told you’re not allowed to feel it?

You weren’t broken.
You weren’t dramatic.
You weren’t weak.

You were a human being trying to survive
in a world that confused emotional control with emotional absence.

And now you know.
And that changes everything.

Further Reading & Research

Michael C